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Submitted on
November 14, 2009
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Dear Lord, I have sinned
I pray to you forgiveness
My list is long
My knees are bruised

I've turned my back to you
I didn't bow my head
I spoke your name in vain
I apologize to you now.

Your brilliant light of purity
Once spread over me
But I ran, afraid of the light
To hide in the dark

I was afraid of the journey
Afraid of the commitment
Dear Lord, forgive me
I have sinned

I'm sang your song of worship
With failed conviction
I hung my head for prayer
And couldn't think of anything

I'm ready to wipe the slate clean
Read, to forgive and forget
I'm ready for devotion
I'll write my name upon the wall.
I guess all the Christian music I've been listening to lately is rubbing off on my poetry. Haha. Anyways I hope you like this one, I've never really written a poem religious influence.

~ Enjoy
Ally
:iconfallenumbrella:
FallenUmbrella Featured By Owner Apr 11, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Interesting religious poem :D I like about how you wrote of sorrow turning into hope for a better life. It's very simple and straightforward, both the form of the poem and the message behind it.

I feel that you can make the last stanza a bit better if you put something along the lines of "Dear Lord, forgive me/I have sinned" since you put that line on the first stanza and then the 4th stanza. That line basically sums up the purpose of the poem, and I think that you can wrap up this poem nicely by using it for the last part :D

Also, should "I'm sang your song of worship" be "I've sang your song of worship"?

Good job on it :D Music does make us think.
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:iconambroseyumiko:
AmbroseYumiko Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Yes, that's what it should have been. Haha.

Thank you very much! This means a lot! :D
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:iconfallenumbrella:
FallenUmbrella Featured By Owner Apr 13, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
yes! I got it :la:

Of course it does :hug:
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